Dating Advice Book on Compatibility Match
November 9th, 2010 . by adminA compatibility match is what people most desire when they go seeking a dating advice book. They want to know how to find, attract, connect with and maintain a relationship with someone that shares a special “fit” with them. They also want to understand why they may have struggled so mightily with accomplishing these things in the past. The best dating advice book has to address all of these desires on all levels. And the one that we recommend most does that.
The first thing to understand is that attraction is a deeply unconscious process. When we meet someone who feels like a compatibility match, we often don’t know exactly why that is the case. Sometimes we even find ourselves surprised by who we are suddenly attracted to and who is attracted to us. Other times we find the attraction completely predictable as it matches a pattern we’ve noticed before. In both of those cases, the role of the unconscious is obvious.
When we fail to understand why we are attracted to or attract someone to us, it is because the reasons for it lie beneath our awareness. And when we are repeatedly attracted to or attract people with a certain background, look, mannerisms, personality traits or style, this pattern also has its roots in our unconscious.
But how and why does the unconscious drive us toward the particular people that it does? This is one of the great mysteries of relationships. And understanding it changed my entire view of dating and romance forever in a way that nothing else I had read before did. Unlocking that mystery clarifies something crucial to the entire process of finding true intimacy – its purpose.
The idea that there is a deeper purpose to intimacy, and that our compatibility match is based on our drive to fulfill that purpose, is a revolutionary one. Purely biologically, we could successfully mate with many people. And while we may seek someone attractive, there are always countless others that are also attractive in their way, yet to whom we feel less drawn. This tells us that fulfilling the deeper purpose of relationships requires us to bond with only certain people that share that compatibility match, not those who don’t.
In the future, we will be discussing much more about what this incredible dating advice book has to say about why we attract and are attracted to the partners that we are – exactly why it is that they, and not others, represent our compatibility match.